Marriage and Couples Counseling is a Discovery Process
Many people are often skeptical about marriage counseling. How could a therapist possibly understand my relationship?
When couples begin marriage counseling, they are able to share their thoughts and express themselves in a safe and supportive environment. In many marriages, people tend to get stuck. Couples often think that they cannot change their sadness or disappointments. Marriage counseling allows you to explore all of your feelings so that you are able to better understand the cause of the tension or discomfort that you feel in your marriage. Marriage counseling can help you to separate thoughts from feelings and help you to you actively listen and negotiate with one another.
In all marriages, couples often experience life cycle changes as their marriage maneuvers through changes in careers, children and growing older. These life cycle changes can be difficult on a marriage. Even though a couple shares a home and family life together, the Couple may become emotionally distant from each other, Routinely, when a wife or husband call, we hear the caller saying “He or she doesn’t listen to me…. we have become distant.”
In other instances, Couples may bring family of origin issues into their marriage. Families of origin issues revolve around how each spouse was raised in their own childhood. The couple may need counseling to understand their marriage in relationship to their own upbringing and how this upbringing is fueling expectations as to ‘how” marriage and family life “should be”?
Other issue that we commonly address in couples counseling
• Fears of intimacy and intimate expression in a relationship.
• Parenting skills.
• Relationship patterns and how to move into healthy intimacy.
• Learning how to communicate assertively and avoiding passive or aggressive communication styles.
• How to avoid emotional distance with your partner.
• Successful separation.
• Lowering the temperature of negative emotions in a committed relationship.
• Intergenerational and extended family conflicts.
A Unique Approach:
Both Dr. Christine Kerr and Gary Kerr are practicing clinical psychotherapists. When working with couples, both Gary and Christine work as a husband and wife team. This unique husband-wife approach allows different perspectives in both gender and communicative style to be explored. The Kerr’s have been married for over 35 years and are well versed in the developmental life cycle of marriage and family life.
We have worked with hundreds of couples and have seen the same problems come up over and over again. We know that each couple is unique in their individuality and worldview. In counseling, we can provide a safe place, where the couple is encouraged to openly express their thoughts and feelings as they navigate their conflicts and learn to listen to each other. By learning to do this, the couple is more open to problem solving.
While it may seem uncomfortable, at first to talk to another person about your issues, a couple can immensely benefit from increased awareness and expert advice designed to help them communicate more effectively. Couples can solve their problems and put the pieces back together again.